I can't hear you... la la la la

Somewhat missguidedly, I got into a Facebook discussion about my weight... I didn't mean to, and now my dad will read it. This is what this blog is for, but I was so frustrated when I got back from the doctors. Oh well, I'll have to deal with that later.

Anyway, a few friends came back and said that I didn't need to worry about my weight, although they could understand my frustration because I exercised so much and ate so little.

It made me feel bad. Because people/friends perceive me as eating so little, when in reality, I haven't been tracking at weekends, and actually I've been eating a lot at weekends (a lot for me vs. my weekday intake anyway).

The truth hurts and it's time for a little brutal self-honesty.

The reasons I haven't been losing weight are:

• Whilst I have been watching what I eat during the week, at the weekends I've been taking it as a free pass to eat what I want and I have been.
• My exercise has been sporadic at best. I've been trying to get to the gym 3 times a week minimum, but work has gotten in the way of that a bit recently and I've only been managing twice a week.
• Even when I have been going to the gym, I probably haven't been doing enough. My running is also sporadic - I'm not consistently able to run 10k, sometimes it's only 7k. I have only been running most of the time. To lose weight properly, I need to step it up and do weights as well as cardio.
• My eating is poor. I have been going for convenience over nutrition and so my lunchtime meal rarely includes any protein - just veggies and a carbohydrate. If I want to get serious about weight loss then I need to control and plan better. I need to make sure I'm getting enough protein but without going over my calories.

I watched Biggest Loser USA last night - it was Week 2, but they all had amazing weight losses again. They let something slip this time: the contestants are limited to 1,200 calories a day, and while they work out for hours, they have a calories burnt target to hit - 1,500 - 2,000.

Now, I know that in my usual working day, there is no way on this earth that I could burn that many calories in a day - I don't know what I burn during a usual run - the machine says 900cals, but it's most likely lower than that. So 2,000 - wowsers! But that's the way they do it.

I really wish I could afford to go to that Weight Loss Ranch in Montana, having someone doing my food for me, and having time every day to do stacks of exercise etc. that would sort me out. But it's a lot of money - £10,000. Although, Hubby has said that if I really wanted liposuction he'd let me do it (personally, I've always thought of that as cheating)... but it's the same sort of cost.

Anyway, in other news - despite the monster drinking and then associated hangover eating fest that was Thursday/Friday last week, I somehow seem to have lost 3lb. The 3lb that I put on last week and I didn't know how.

Despite everything I've tracked and read and absorbed over the past 12 years of doing this, my body is still a complete mystery to me!!!