Slow progress

So, I had weigh in last night and despite earning 24 bonus points through exercise and only eating 16 points a day for the past 3 days, this wasn't enough to make up for the weekend. And so according to my scales at home, I lost diddly squat, but according to the WW scales, I lost 0.5lb, except I know that I didn't because it was only due to wearing different clothes to weigh in.

So, my progress over the past 4 weeks since I have started running for 2-3 hours a week?

Half a pound, stayed the same, half a pound.

True, I have had some weekends of eating out etc. but I would have thought that with the increased exercise, this would have been enough. After all, I know women who join WW and the weight drops off just because they're cutting out the junk food and weekly take aways. Hubby meanwhile has seen more progress than me, and he does half the exercise and eats more points, cheese and alcohol which I have completely cut out.

So. I clearly need to step it up. Do I have the energy for 4/5 workouts a week? Could I manage that?
I also need to stop "overeating" at the weekends. I put this in speech marks because by most people's standards what I eat at the weekends is not overeating, but compared to what I eat during the week it is waaay too much, even with the exercise. Clearly this is the case otherwise I would be losing 1lb a week at least, consistently.

This seems to be getting so much harder though than it used to be. I used to be able to get back down to 12st relatively easily, but now I seem stuck up nearer 13stone.

I have been saying this for months now about how I need to take control of my weekends, but I always find it so hard as food forms such an integral part of my social life, and not being able to enjoy meals out makes me feel like I am missing out.

Tonight we drive to the in-laws. I love them to bits, but they are very traditional in terms of food - lots of pies, bread and potatoes. I need to remember to fill up on vegetables, avoid the potatoes, small portions of pie. I KNOW this, and yet, when faced with it, I can't seem to summon up the will power to do what needs to be done.

I've got to sort this out, but I don't know how. Try and remember what being slimmer felt like? It seems so long ago now, and was so fleeting in any case.

I listen too much to the people that tell me I don't need to worry, I'm fine as I am, I am fit and healthy and that's what matters. I need the voice inside me to shout louder and I need to listen to it. I am NOT fine as I am. I am 3 stone overweight. I NEED to lose this weight. Why?

• Because I want to wear nice clothes that fit well
• Because I want to wear half the clothes in my wardrobe that are too small for me currently
• Because I would like to weigh the same, if not less, than my husband
• Because I want my mother to stop buying me clothes that make me look about 20 years older than I am
• Because I want to feel good about myself
• Because I want to stop putting my husband and myself through this damn rollercoaster every year of our lives together
• Because I want to wear a bikini on holiday (which may now be only a matter of weeks away)
• Because I want to be normal